Model Essay 3
Topic: The most crucial decisions in life call upon us to choose not between "good and bad" but between "good and good".
Model Essay 3
What is the difference between good and bad? When faced with the most important decisions in life, there will usually not be any absolute good or absolute bad. Also, there may not be any guidelines to follow to choose the good over the bad. Even though most of us face the same circumstances, what is good for one person need not necessarily be good for another one. In such a case, how do we identify what is good and what is bad? There are no easy answers to this question. However, having a deep understanding of ourselves will help us distinguish the good and bad from two seemingly good alternatives.
One of the ways to differentiate between the good and the bad is to understand our priorities. In any situation, when contemplating the available choices, it is difficult to identify the right metric on which to evaluate the available choices. Finding the right metric is the first step to distinguish between the choices and label them as ‘good’ or ‘bad’. For example, when looking for a new job, should salary be the primary concern or the type of work? Should the job location play an important part or should the reputation of the company? These kind of questions only help us prioritize what we value most.
Even if we are clear on what the basis is for evaluating our options, in most decisions that carry any import, we can seldom label our options as ‘good’ or ‘bad’. If we are able to easily distinguish the good and bad among the options available to us, it often indicates that we have not evaluated our options comprehensively.
The world around us is not black and white. Using a bivalent classification in most cases reflects a lack of understanding about the nature of our society. Hence, we must refrain from hastily classifying our options as good and bad and we must first gain enough understanding about ourselves before we can properly classify our choices as ‘good’ or ‘bad’.
Feedback and Comments:
Overall impression:
Good.
Detailed feedback:
The introduction of the essay stands out as it is arresting.
An attempt is made to evaluate the subjective nature of the topic. There is then an assessment of what goes into decision making.
The conclusion could be improved, though. It leaves us with the feeling that the writer is not expressing an opinion beyond saying that considering a choice to be good or poor is to be left to the individual, in the light of his or her circumstances.
The essay makes use of correct diction. There are no grammatical mistakes in the essay and even rules of punctuation are religiously adhered to.
Evaluation parameters and score:
Model Essay 3
What is the difference between good and bad? When faced with the most important decisions in life, there will usually not be any absolute good or absolute bad. Also, there may not be any guidelines to follow to choose the good over the bad. Even though most of us face the same circumstances, what is good for one person need not necessarily be good for another one. In such a case, how do we identify what is good and what is bad? There are no easy answers to this question. However, having a deep understanding of ourselves will help us distinguish the good and bad from two seemingly good alternatives.
One of the ways to differentiate between the good and the bad is to understand our priorities. In any situation, when contemplating the available choices, it is difficult to identify the right metric on which to evaluate the available choices. Finding the right metric is the first step to distinguish between the choices and label them as ‘good’ or ‘bad’. For example, when looking for a new job, should salary be the primary concern or the type of work? Should the job location play an important part or should the reputation of the company? These kind of questions only help us prioritize what we value most.
Even if we are clear on what the basis is for evaluating our options, in most decisions that carry any import, we can seldom label our options as ‘good’ or ‘bad’. If we are able to easily distinguish the good and bad among the options available to us, it often indicates that we have not evaluated our options comprehensively.
The world around us is not black and white. Using a bivalent classification in most cases reflects a lack of understanding about the nature of our society. Hence, we must refrain from hastily classifying our options as good and bad and we must first gain enough understanding about ourselves before we can properly classify our choices as ‘good’ or ‘bad’.
Feedback and Comments:
Overall impression:
Good.
Detailed feedback:
The introduction of the essay stands out as it is arresting.
An attempt is made to evaluate the subjective nature of the topic. There is then an assessment of what goes into decision making.
The conclusion could be improved, though. It leaves us with the feeling that the writer is not expressing an opinion beyond saying that considering a choice to be good or poor is to be left to the individual, in the light of his or her circumstances.
The essay makes use of correct diction. There are no grammatical mistakes in the essay and even rules of punctuation are religiously adhered to.
Evaluation parameters and score:
PARAMETERS | DETAILS | POINTS ON 10 | WEIGHTAGE | TOTAL |
1) Content | Adequacy of information | 7 | X 2 | 14 |
2) Ideas and their development | Elaboration through reasoning, explanation, examples | 7 | X 3 | 21 |
3) Perspective | Pros and cons, different aspects, parallel reasoning, suggestions | 7 | X 1 | 7 |
4) Structure | Logical idea-flow in Intro-Body-Conclusion form | 7 | X 2 | 14 |
5) Control over language | Grammar and spellings, sentence construction and punctuation | 9 | X 2 | 18 |
OVERALL | 74 |